Elle combat le coronavirus en buvant des smoothies de sperme

Tracy Kiss pense avoir trouvé la parade contre le COVID-19. Sa méthode ? Des jus de sperme !

Selon elle, le sperme aiderait à combattre le coronavirus, mais pas que. En 2016 déjà, cette maman de deux enfants déclarait boire du sperme afin de renforcer ses défenses immunitaire contre les simples rhumes.

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Du coup, contre le COVID-19, le traitement du Dr Tracy Kiss est simple : un verre de sperme par jour. Et elle recommande également d’en mettre en prime sur le visage, pour les problèmes de peau. Ca fait cinq ans que ça dure, et ça a l’air de bien lui aller !

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“Oui, chaque cuillère à café de sperme contient plus de 200 vitamines et minéraux, c’est une multivitamine naturelle pour tous en plus d’être un antidépresseur naturel, les gens n’en parlent jamais parce que les magasins ne peuvent pas le vendre et en tirer profit!”, déclare-t-elle sur son compte Instagram, en arborant son sperme congelé.

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Malheureusement, ça l’a un peu éloigné de sa famille, a-t-elle déclaré aux médias auglo-saxons. “Mes proches ne voulaient plus me faire la bise”. Un bon moyen d’instaurer un geste-barrière, donc !

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L’étude Discovery va-t-elle ajouter ce protocole de traitements à son panel de tests en double-p… pardon en double-aveugle randomisée ? Rien n’est moins sûr !!

En attendant, tout ça peut aiguiser la curiosité. Du coup, voici la composition exacte du sperme humain, pour une cuillère à café, soit environ 5mL :

  • Kcalories : 20
  • Protéines: 150mg
  • Lipides : 6mh
  • Glucides: 11mg
  • Cholestérol: 3mg

Enfin, le sperme contient, outre les 200 à 500 millions de spermatozoïdes, des enzymes, de la vitamine C, de la vitamine B12, du calcium, des protéines, du sodium, du Zinc, de l’acide citrique, et du fructose.

Si on regarde un peu tout ça, il faut reconnaître une chose. C’est que les minéraux et vitamines (à part l’acide citrique et le fructose) contenus dans le sperme sont effectivement ceux qui sont objectivement recommandés pour renforcer son système immunitaire. Je dirais qu’il manque juste la vitamine D.

Sans compter l’apport protéique très élevé !

Mais attention, ce que votre partenaire masculin mange peut affecter le goût du sperme:

  • Les viandes rouges, les produits laitiers, les oignons, l’ail et le café peuvent donner un goût amer et acide au sperme.
  • Les aliments contenant du fructose comme les fruits peuvent donner un goût sucré au sperme.


Risques de MST :

Attention, avant de jouer aux naturopathes du dimanche, le sperme peut être conducteur d’infections transmises sexuellement comme le SIDA (ça serait bête de le cumuler avec le covid, ça vous ferait peut-être deux SIDA du coup!!) et l’hépatite B et C. Donc, s’il y a une blessure dans la région buccale, il y a un haut risque de transmission d’ITS. Cela vaut donc pour la simple fellation ! Si vous avez un aphte ou n’importe quoi d’autre à la bouche, oubliez cette pratique !

Enfin, certaines personnes sont allergiques au sperme. Dommage pour elles !

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27 avril 2020 18 h 18 min

J’aime beaucoup cette demoiselle…